Same old, same old...busy...

I always heard the "I'm so busy with...______(fill in the blank)"...from friends with older kids. I wondered if it could really be THAT busy.
It can.
We had baseball 5 days last week!!! Seriously???? Yes, seriously. We are BUSY. And not just with baseball!!:-)
I'm focusing on the simplicity of loving Jesus...believing his ultimate sovereign control over everything.
We are praying about some big decisions right now...just wanting to wait and believe.
Please pray for Ezekiel Wed morn...he's having a minor surgery!
Thanks! Do I even have any readers anymore? I'm a pathetic blogger!!!

The Baby is 4

My baby turned four a few weeks ago. Four. FOUR. How can my baby girl be F.O.U.R. ?????????
She is full of life, happy, funny, sweet, affectionate, passionate....and four. I used to call her "the icing on the cake." Yes the boys are great...and I love them each for different things and for the same things. But Violet....is just Violet.
There are so many great things about my youngest being 4, and so many things that tear at my heart and cause me arrhythmias.
But such is life...the beautiful flowering can be painful...

Pity Party for One please

I'm facing some discouragement that I'm ashamed to admit. Its sort of gross. My words would love to assure you that I'm just living in the Graces of Jesus and sailing along each day, evangelizing, bringing people to Jesus, sharing Grace, Love and Truth all around...but nope. Not true. And maybe nobody is living that life. Except Jesus. That's the life He lived. And calls me to live. So what holds me up? Just junk.
Lately the form has been discouragement...in the area of inconsistency. I was bummed for most of yesterday, thinking about how big my words are, but how small my actions are. The crazy thing - is I wasn't even thinking of spiritual things. I was thinking about: the chore charts I have not done, the frames I bought for the kids to pain for Jason for Fathers day that we never did, the cute banner I wanted to make...that I bought the stuff for and never did, the undone baby books, unprinted pictures, unfollowed budget, untrained marathon training plan, etc. I could easily go on. Verses not memorized, books not read, activities for the kids not done...all I have TALKED about, none have I ACTED on. I was all "woe is me, I suck" last night and then when I woke this morning, realized something...that stuff actually doesn't really matter. But what DOES matter is the spiritual side of these things. I read in 1 Peter 2 this morning about Faith vs. Deeds. Deeds come with Faith. That's a fact. So am I DOING what I'm SAYING about Jesus? That DOES matter! And in a lot of ways, NOPE, I'm not. THAT is what should keep me up at night. NOT the lack of activities, chore charts, marathon successes or baby books....BUT the missed opportunities, the focus on ME, the lack of faith, the lack of love and devotion for Jesus and just living my life for something other than what I was created for.

Merry Christmas!

We are enjoying this season...but I am bothered by how much of the focus is on Santa, and if my kids have been "good" or not(not by me...but others)...I read a blog by Jen Hatmaker (I think?) posted by my sister (in law) Sarah and have not stopped thinking about it. I find myself stressing over what presents for who, and is there enough, and will they love this or that??? It's SO not about that. But its so hard to turn everything on its side. Change it all up. Bring us back to Square One. Jesus. That's all. It's about Jesus. Every bit. How do I unpeel the materialism and greed from my kids...and ME too?!

No good

Just no good at keeping up on blogging!!
Life is full! How is it already Dec(tom)...I am excited for this holiday season with my cuties. We currently spend much time on the beach...playing on the "burm" (spelling?)...a huge sand wall. The kids ride boogie boards down it, flip, roll and wrestle. It's fun. And sandy! Miss v and I hang out...one day she wanted to have a photo sesh kissing each other. She's so funny. :-)

Last week was Violet's first day of preschool. I was emotional, as I thought about my last baby being old enough to be in preschool. Its a cute co-op that I get to be a big part of and she is loving it so far.
Lately, I have been struggling with discontent. I hear/see FB posts about those homeschooling their kids and start feeling like I should be doing that. I see/hear/find out about people doing this or that...and think I should be doing that as well. I find out about others adopting orphans and feel...jealous (?) because I'm not. Or those having babies...and I'm not. You get the picture. I'm comparing where I'm at with where God has others and I'm feeling discontent. That's NOT ok!! God has been reminding me that I am where I'm at because of God's plan. God's will. I have to CHOOSE daily to be content with each of these areas. I don't really want to home school...but I DO want my kids to love Jesus. I have realized that my kids don't have to be home schooled, be in the Bible club at school or spend time with ONLY Christians for them to love Jesus. The great thing is GOD is SO much bigger than that. He is going to grab their hearts in HIS time regardless of the circumstances in their lives. I can rest in the fact that the Lord loves my kids even more than ME, has a plan for them (and me!) and has us where we're at for a reason. Thank goodness its not up to me!!!

Birthday weekend

How can my baby be 8 already?? I know we all share these sentiments. The cheesy line "time goes so fast" turns into an ugly, glaring truth. My first born. My sweet, tender, generous, loving boy. I've blinked and he has turned from infant, to toddler, to little boy...to BIG boy. I'm so proud to be this boys momma. Gavin is such a gift and I love celebrating him. Today: miniature golf, and Chuck E Cheese with a couple friends/family...tomorrow a big family party with the whole Prince gang...including our UK family :)